( Read more... )

Takne from Celebritywit.com
Paul McCartney on phone to [ex-]wife: I just can't wait until I never have to see your face again!
Heather Mills: You'll never get rid of me!

Taken from Overheard in New York

Little boy: Mom, how did the dinosaurs cook their meat?
Mother: They didn't, they ate it raw.
Little boy: Oh. [Long pause.] Are Japanese people dinosaurs?

Stupid People
"Where do these stupid people come from? Well, they come from American schools. But while they're attending these schools, they're never identified as stupid. That comes later, when they grow up. When they're kids, you can't call them stupid. Which may be contributing to the problem."

( Read more... )

Marty DiBergi: Do you feel that playing rock 'n' roll music keeps you a child? That is, keeps you in a state of arrested development ( Read more... )

"Some days you make Chicken Little look like a Zen Buddhist Monk."
-Avonelle Wing, to Me.

"It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
-Dan Quayle

That man never ceases to amuse me.

"Never wear anything that panics the cat."
-P. J. O'Rourke

"I made a man, with eyes of coal
And a smile so bewitchin'.
How was I supposed to know
That my Mom was dead in the kitchen?

Lalalalalalalalala

And my Mother's ashes,
Even her eyelashes
Are resting in a little yellow jar.

And sometimes when it's breezey
Or when I'm feeling sneezy..."

We love Phoebe!